We are nowhere, and it's now.

This morning, I saw an Air Force dude sitting at a table, with a laptop and a Dora the Explorer book. He was reading his little daughter a bedtime story. I'm so glad i don't have kids right now. I don't think I could do that.

So, it's been a while. too long. I promised myself I'd write at least every day. i want to give those who are rooting for me back home something to look forward to.

Now that I've completed my rest and recuperation leave, I think I can give a proper assessment of what went down. Makes sense, right? Now that it's over, I can talk about it.

I was really apprehensive the night before I got on the plane to go home. Would home be as I'd left it? Would leave be as enjoyable and full of adventure as I'd hope it'd be? Would people get sick of me after a bit? What would be different about me, and would people notice?

Well, I gotta say, I was quite impressed with the way it all went down. Sure the flights (Bagram-Kuwait-Germany-Atlanta-JFK-Vermont, a total of 21 hours of flight) were crazy long, but each stage was one less I had to deal with. I was coming home! Taco Bell, Boston, Sheila, 4th of July, Ben, Kennedy, family, sleeping in... what's not to love and look forward to?

About a week into the whole thing, I tried to think back to the 5 months I've spent so far away from home. It felt like years ago. Details were fuzzy, and the only real memories I had were from the stories of my adventures I've told countless times. It was good, though. It allowed me to focus on the here and now.

I don't feel that anyone I was around understood what I've gone through. Sure, I'm not infantry, and I'm not in gunfights everyday. But trust me, Afghanistan leaves a lasting impression on you, whatever you are doing, whereever you are. No one I was with saw the things I've seen, or felt the things I've felt. No one had trouble sleeping because fighter jets weren't screaming overhead at all hours of the night. No one understood that I had to check my car for IEDs before getting in it. No one got it. And it was totally okay that no one did. I would never want them to. It was hard, though, not being able to relate to anyone about what I've been through. I couldn't tell stories and things, because, let's face it, I still have 5 months to go, and I don't want to scare my loved ones.

The best part was the way that everything felt like normal. It was like I'd never left, in some aspects. I got to do about everything I set out to do with the small amount of time I had.

The hardest part? Saying goodbye to Kennedy. This little 3-year-old has such a hold on my heart, it actually hurt closing the door. Saying goodbye to Ben and Sheila was very hard to do, but I felt prepared for those things, because I've done them before. I haven't seen Kennedy in so long, and she grew so big. I can't stand being so far away from her. I've always wanted to be a huge part of her life, and I feel like she doesn't remember me from way back when. And I keep having to leave her. That is hard.

I'm back at Bagram now, and it's like nothing's changed, which is good. I'm gonna try to get into a better routine this time around. I'm waking up earlier, and plan on having a few hours of the day that is just mine. I'll use this time to workout if I wish, I can call home, I can have a leisurely breakfast, and I can get my head on straight for the day's work. I like the early morning a lot, I just hate the prospect of loosing a few hours of sleep. Because I absolutely love to sleep.

So, what else is there to say? Did I leave you wanting more? comment if you think there's something big I missed. I just started writing, and I'm not sure if i got it all down. Help me out here. The cool part about the internet is that there is an infinite amount of paper. I can write all day.